Let me start by saying that not one of us is happy 100% of the time, that’s just not realistic until we conquer our expectations of other people, events and even life itself. Being unhappy sometimes is a perfectly normal, realistic response which tells us we are resistant and not loving what is. You will find that we all fluctuate between happiness and unhappiness most of the time as we learn to come to terms with reality.
However, being unhappy all of the time is unnecessary suffering.
There are many theories that attempt to explain why we are unhappy.
Numerology for example, which, to be honest, you need to be psychic or a physicist/ mathematician to work out what it all means. Having a course of treatment with a Psychiatrist or Psychologist or even a counselor, may also assist you to identify ‘Why?’.
Following are three quotes from people who have their own views on unhappiness
“When you’re unhappy, I guess everything in the world – reading, eating, sleeping, has something buried somewhere inside it that just makes you unhappier” – Nick Hornby – A Long Way Down
“If you have done something meritorious, you experience pleasure and happiness: if wrong things, suffering. A happy or unhappy life is your own creation. Nobody else is responsible. If you remember this, you won’t find fault with anybody. You are your own best friend as well as your worst enemy (99)” Swami Satchidananda, Yoga Sutras of Patanjali
"Unhappiness is a dangerous thing, like carbon monoxide. You don’t smell it, you don’t taste it, it’s formless and colorless, but it poisons slowly. It seeps into every pore of your skin until one day your heart just stops beating” Bella Pollen – Midnight Cactus
There are medical conditions that result from being severely unhappy, such as Clinical Depression, as a guide line only, take the test on the following website to help you decide if this may be happening to you:
One thing is certain though, when we feel particularly unhappy we usually feel worse when we hear comments such as “Just build a Bridge and get over it”, “Buck your Ideas Up” or, “Why don’t you Pull Yourself Together?”. In fact, sometimes a simple solution, such as a good chat with a friend over a cup of tea, can do wonders and helps you deal with your current unhappy feelings.
If you can identify what is causing you to feel so unhappy, and through self-analysis and acknowledgement, you take steps to free yourself of harmful negative thoughts and feelings: you may find resolution and happiness and freedom from exhaustion and being unhappy.
If you find, however, that you just cannot find a substantive reason for such an increase in miserable feelings and are therefore unable to free yourself of feeling unhappy all the time, then you should seek help.
The feelings you are experiencing can come from way back in time and can be associated with conditioning you received from your family of origin or friendships and situations that were not resolved before. There is no way back to that point in time to take a different approach and change the outcomes, and even if we could, that would not guarantee our happiness today.
The answers are inside you, or as Louise likes to say “The issues are in the Tissues”. Your body will reflect your physical and mental and emotional status.
When you love the reality of what is, you experience love all around, and you are loving towards yourself and others. When you resist reality, the resistance creates great tension in your mind and body, resulting in anger, sadness and often pain.
Psychosomatic Therapy could be an answer to your prayers for relief. We often realize that popping pills does not cure our moods successfully, yet sometimes it is a good thing to take the sharp edge off things, particularly if we feel suicidal.The difficulty arises when pills mask the problem, and the deep seated unhappiness is still growing inside our body and mind and is so easily triggered.
Louise Wood is a qualified Psychosomatic Therapist and can show you some pretty amazing evidence about your inner responses to your life by showing you the affect your responses have had, or are having, on your outward appearance. “Your body does not lie about your responses and thoughts about your experiences in life.” She says, “Your mind may try to deny your true feelings but they will still be visible or represented in your physical shape and form somewhere.”What Shape are you in physically, emotionally, spiritually?”
Together you will take a thorough look and, with acupressure/trigger point emotional release techniques, Louise releases the tension and resistance from your entire body. The result is a brighter, lighter experience of being. Through acknowledgement and acceptance, you become your own best friend and repair-ist. Life just doesn’t get happier than that!